Love is a killer

These scars will never fade,
It is art which I have made.
Memories forever in my skin,
Defeating me from within.
That night so cold,
With a blade to hold.
Slicing swiftly and deep,
Wishing, waiting, for eternal sleep.
So much blood, so much pain,
The next night it'd happen again.
Ironic really, you'd never believe
My way of survival was killing me.
Twenty four weeks and now I see,
That could have been the death of me.
Out with the old, in with the new,
I confided in her & our love grew.
Blossoming. Inseperable beings.
Inspiring. unexperienced feelings.
Every argument, in the night,
I see the scars, see that sight.
Think of our love and smile,
It helps, for a while.
Losing love is the hardest thing,
The thing which drove me to this sting.
It also saved me,
As well as betray me.
A good friend will be there in the end,
Oh the happiness which love can send.
White lines representing pain,
The monster inside she helped me tame.
No longer do I unzip my skin,
To release the power of the beast within.
I'm strong because of defeat,
One day though, it's you I'll beat.
I'll use my anger to win,
Anger from this mess I'm in.
You used to weaken me,
Now you only empower me.
I'm everything you didnt want,
But thats where my smile is from.
You're worthless and frail,
Defeated by the likes of rain and hail.
What makes you weak, just makes me stronger.
You'll die soon and I'll live longer.
Look at me go,
Smiling and you'll never know.
You're dead. I'm free.
You no longer control me.
The more you say, the more I defy you,
These words could never be so true.
I look down once more,
I see that knife on the floor.
The blood tastes so sweet,
The ultimate treat.
Seeing your face as I fall down,
You scream, and turn around.
I lay there, smiling.
You stand, crying.
Suffering over, ended.
Now, happiness commences.

--
Rajeev (29th sep)

Comfortably Numb

this is the recent one (9th sep 07 )

I see you watching me
But it has no affect on me
I'm comfortably numb

In my own world
Without your touch
I'm comfortably numb

With my own thoughts
And feelings
The ice replaces nerves
The smiles stop but it's all ok now

I'm comfortably numb
By myself in the dark night
Awake and staring into the abyss

I'm comfortably numb
A slash of words escape
But my blockade is impenetrable
My eyes reveal the sadness
But it betrays my actions
Because

I'm comfortably numb.

Kiss the rain / kiss in the rain

Standing in the rain
Cold and icy
I let the kisses of the sky soak me
Wash away my pain
The rain cleanses me
Makes me clean again
Each drop a kiss from the sky
A gift to the earth
Birth and renewal
Like a phoenix born of the flames
I am born again of the rain
The wind blows to calm me
Wiping away my tears
Blowing away my anger
Wind and Rain
Until I am happy again.

A tribute to opeth

In the woods of Blackwater Park

Lies a house of Hidden Worlds

Confusing the word that blinds me

Leaving my Reality

Beyond the Hour

Of Unearthly Peace

Seeking the light

That belongs to the soul of the unforgiven

Ghosts of the sleep

Seeking the death that whispered a lullaby

The Morningrise

That wakes the devil

Full of deceit of eternal Damnation

Still life

Is taking over

Seeking the Orchid

That leads to a better world

I seek the grave

From my arms to your hearse

I wake up and see the light of day

I now leave the space that took me away….

Ek kavi ki mrityu

"Kyun main kavi banne ki koshish karta hoon ?
Kyun main hamesha jhagdata hoon,
is kalam se ?
apane vicharo se ?
apne aap se ?
yahi sochkar ki likhu tto kya likhu ?
udasi se bhari kavita aur nahi likh sakta main,
na hi tere jaane ke gam ko lekar,
shabd hai par vicharo ki kami hai,
vicharo ke gahre samunder me dubu bhi tto kaise ?
isame dubne ki nishani aaj bhi aankho me nami hai"


I decided not to write after writing this but poemist me( ya if u call novelist to one who writes novels :P/)..

Choose un-life

Choose un-life.
Choose an empire.
Choose Opeth's damnation.
Choose 6 lieutenants.
Choose a big fucking Soul Reaver.
Choose clan symbols, sanctuaries, and machines that blow smoke into the sky. Choose Immortality, low erythrocyte count, and dental insurance.
Choose leather pants and matching shoulder-drapes.
Choose her and wondering what the fuck are those things on her back when she walks in on that Sunday morning.
Choose throwing him into the abyss then run like hell when he comes back 500 years later, pissed off and with a wraith-blade that has your name on it.
Choose chucking the whole thing at the end of it all, leaving this miserable world to that selfish fucked up brat , while you and she go back to the past and try to save history. Choose a prophecy.
Choose a paradox...
CHOOSE: REFUSE THE SACRIFICE
--
choose life (trainspotting) made me to write this